It is sometimes hard. Other times, disheartening and most shameful when we hear that word applied to our trials. When a person says “I failed”, immediately negative emotions and connotations come to mind. Think of the times you had a bad grade, or when you’ve failed on a personal level. You got punished on some level. Immediately, people start to blame themselves, judge too harshly and a whole host of damaging emotions start to surface. This conditioned most of us to believe that failure is bad and should be avoided. However, if you’ve ever failed in school, work or in life, you must know that you’re in good company. It would be fair to assume that 100 percent of the readers here have failed at something. So, why do we equate failure with defeat and feel bad?
We are not born with this mindset. Have you ever met a baby who gave up on walking on two legs because they kept falling down? Do they just accept that they can’t speak when they babble? Then no one would walk or speak! Thinking of failure as defeat encourages the act of quitting without giving it everything. It depletes us of the courage required to succeed.
The biggest disfavor you can do yourself is to see failure as the opposite of success, that’s defeat. In fact, failure is part of success. Failure means that you tried and that you should try again! It’s a part of everyday life, we are biologically wired to fail until we succeed. It’s completely natural to be afraid of failure but not to feel bad. The most important point of failure is to try again until you succeed.
Failure is a great tool we can use to sharpen our knives, focus our tools change our course to a better plan. Usually with tweaks and changes to our original plan, success is most of the time just around the corner.
Hence, the greatest ill you can do to yourself is seeing failure as defeat. People are often so afraid they’ll fail at something that they don’t try. Don’t be one of those people. Failure is the one constant guarantee in life. However, that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try. After all you don’t want to look back at your life and be disappointed that you didn’t succeed? So next time you fail, get up and try again until you make it and avoid saying shoulda, woulda, coulda!